America’s Affordable Health Choices Act of 2009 Unconstitutional?

 

Assuming we accept The Constitution of the United States of America as our governing document, Congress has no Constitutional authority to enact government run health care.

Here are the powers of Congress as set in Article 1 Section 8 of the Constitution:

“The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes, Duties, Imposts and
Excises, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defense and general
Welfare of the United States; but all Duties, Imposts and Excises shall be
uniform throughout the United States;

To borrow money on the credit of the United States;

To regulate Commerce with foreign Nations, and among the several States, and
with the Indian Tribes;

To establish an uniform Rule of Naturalization, and uniform Laws on the subject
of Bankruptcies throughout the United States;

To coin Money, regulate the Value thereof, and of foreign Coin, and fix the
Standard of Weights and Measures;

To provide for the Punishment of counterfeiting the Securities and current Coin
of the United States;

To establish Post Offices and Post Roads;

To promote the Progress of Science and useful Arts, by securing for limited
Times to Authors and Inventors the exclusive Right to their respective Writings
and Discoveries;

To constitute Tribunals inferior to the supreme Court;

To define and punish Piracies and Felonies committed on the high Seas, and
Offenses against the Law of Nations;

To declare War, grant Letters of Marque and Reprisal, and make Rules concerning
Captures on Land and Water;

To raise and support Armies, but no Appropriation of Money to that Use shall be
for a longer Term than two Years;

To provide and maintain a Navy;

To make Rules for the Government and Regulation of the land and naval Forces;

To provide for calling forth the Militia to execute the Laws of the Union,
suppress Insurrections and repel Invasions;

To provide for organizing, arming, and disciplining the Militia, and for
governing such Part of them as may be employed in the Service of the United
States, reserving to the States respectively, the Appointment of the Officers,
and the Authority of training the Militia according to the discipline
prescribed by Congress;

To exercise exclusive Legislation in all Cases whatsoever, over such District
(not exceeding ten Miles square) as may, by Cession of particular States, and
the acceptance of Congress, become the Seat of the Government of the United
States, and to exercise like Authority over all Places purchased by the Consent
of the Legislature of the State in which the Same shall be, for the Erection of
Forts, Magazines, Arsenals, dock-Yards, and other needful Buildings; And

To make all Laws which shall be necessary and proper for carrying into
Execution the foregoing Powers, and all other Powers vested by this
Constitution in the Government of the United States, or in any Department or
Officer thereof.”

Furthermore Amendment 10 of the Constitution states this:

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor
prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to
the people.

It seems clear to me there is no provision whatsoever in our Constitution for government run health care.  If this “power (is) not delegated to the United States by the Constitution” then it belongs to the States or the People. 

Whether you agree with the proposed Health Care plan or not how is it possible that they have the power to make such a change.  Congress has enumerated new powers to themselves not given to them by our founding document. If you support this or have a counter argument as to where it gives them this power please post your explanation.

The best toy my wife every got me!

My wife's great line for years and years now has been "Children are the best toy I ever got Michael". It is so true! A quick example.

The other night me and the two toddlers and the 14yr old were in the living room. The TV happened to be on in the background. We usually do not turn it on until the little tax deductions go to bed. Well a commercial caught Gabe's eye as he was walking by. So he stopped looked at me, looked at the TV, and said "Da dadadad da da ddada deedde" which is cute enough but then he pointed again. That is when I had my awful good idea as the Grinch would say. The next time he pointed to the TV I muted the TV (with the remote down by my side). He would put his hand down and I would un-mute the TV. It took him no more than three times of this for him to see the pattern. Gabe would point, I would mute, he would put his hand down I would un-mute. He was convinced he had some magical powers to make the talking box be quiet. Meanwhile the 14yr old is about to pass out she is laughing so hard. Ah fun times :) You have to try this with your toddler!

~M

Nary a Regret

The trophy wife and I were talking the other day on a long ride home about our lives before we had brains.  She asked if I had any regrets about how I lived my life or things that I had done.  I didn’t have to think long because I have already pondered this question many times in my own head. 

While there are a couple hair styles I would rather not have sported I have nary a regret.  Every choice that I have made either good or bad has brought me to where and who I am today.  Even some of the bad decisions, like being lazy in the first couple of jobs I had, or not going to college, could be seen as mistakes or regrets but each of those taught me something.  I developed a good work ethic as a result of being fired a couple of times.  If I had gone to college then perhaps my wife and I would have never met, married, and had children.  Each experience whether good or bad has shaped the way I think and the outlooks I have. 

I think we parent this way.  We guide our children and advise them but where not dangerous we let them make their own mistakes.  If we see them making the same mistakes over and over again then we have to give more guidance. 

 

When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.    ~Alexander Graham Bell

The Blink Heard Around the World

As children I think we have all played the staring game.  We sit across from our opponent as we get in one last blink then it is on!
Eyes wide daring the other to blink first. 

As children we are wagering for milk money. More likely we are vying for the title of “Staring Champion, Thomas Jefferson Elementary School, Second Grade 1978. “ As adults the stakes get much higher.

Many view history as the boring stories of dead people.  Why should we care right?  If you stop and think about it though you watch history every day.  Our present will become our children’s history. 

I believe we just witnessed such a day. Under President Bush we struck a deal with Poland and the Czech Republic to install a missile defense shield in Central Europe.  This was obviously a huge deal for Poland and a point of contention with Russian and Iran.  This shield was to protect our allies and our home land against the Iranian threat of Nuclear or ballistic missiles.  With this shield in place we would be able to engage any missile fired at Israel or even our troops in Afghanistan.  On September 17th 2009 President Obama lost the staring competition and gave into the Russians and sent a clear signal to Iran that we were not serious about protecting our allies.  Iran and Russia see the significance of this blink heard around the world but I think us Americans have not caught on to the fact that we just witnessed a date that will be recorded in our children’s children’s history books.  Couple that with President Obama’s indecision in Afghanistan and Iraq and you have an open door for an arrogant and delusional Iranian government. 

It is time for you to act, continue to write your legislators.  Stand up for what you believe.   Let our government know how we feel and if they fail to represent us as they are paid and elected to do then let us vote them out!

~M

Small Town feel

I grew up in a Town called Concord, North Carolina for most of my life.  It was small and still rooted in much of the history of the area, however it was less than 30 minutes from Charlotte, NC which was a fast growing city due to the banking industry.  So even though I thought Concord was a small town it really was connected to a large city.  Concord today is really just the sprawl of Charlotte.  It has all the big city things including a NASCAR track, and a Mills Mall.

I live in a small town now in Texas, it still has some small town feel to it but then again it is adjacent to Frisco TX and then Plano and then Dallas which is obviously a very large metroplex.  We are on the outskirts of the concrete jungle but we can still see it from the front porch.  We can drive less than a mile down the road and see horses and cattle and open farm land so it is sort of the best of both worlds.  We have all the conveniences of the big city and the quietness of a small town.

While I thought I knew what a small poor town was I really had no clue.  I always lived near a big city.  This past week I spent some quality time in the small poverty stricken towns of New Mexico.  First we went to my mother-in-laws house in Roswell NM which is actually one of the larger cities in NM and is much like the town I grew up in.  Saturday we traveled an hour back east to Lovington NM which is near the border of Texas and New Mexico.  I was taken back by the slowness of the people there.  I was also taken back by the obvious poverty and the lifestyles that lends itself too.  The houses that would be condemned in most places are proud places of residence here in Lovington.  There is no Wal-Mart (the nearest one is 23 miles away) just Bob’s Supermarket, there are no name brand hotel’s, we stayed at the Lovington Inn which was surprisingly clean and affordable.  The people were working class with little material possessions and what appeared to be little desire to obtain them.  They seem quite content with the life they are leading and the pace at which they are traveling. 

The pace of life is the other thing that stood out to me on this trip.  No one is in a hurry!  I mean no one!  You could sit at a red light for two cycles and no one would even blow their horn at you.  I went into the local Town and Country gas station to buy a couple things and the lady behind the counter seemed in no particular hurry at all to check my items out and get me out of the store.  She took the time to make small talk, fiddle with something or another behind the register and yell across the store to a co-worker who was learning how to do inventory.  Maybe they are on to something here.  They seem very content in a place I would consider oppressive so who’s perspective is wrong?  The simpler life, the out of the rat race life, does seem attractive in many ways but then again, high speed internet, Best Buy, and Wal-Mart are great conveyances too!  I enjoyed my visit because of the change in culture and pace.  I learned a lot from talking with my family who lives there and from hearing their life experiences.  I am looking forward to going back although that is mostly due to my family being there.

Brian Urlacher of the Chicago Bears is from Lovington.  Their native son gone on to fame.  Nice mural.

Dear Gabe

Dear Gabriel Tryece Faries,

May 12, 2009

It has been a tradition in our family since we became foster parents to write a letter to those children that we have been blessed with for only a point and time in their lives. These are generally very hard letters to write. We have no idea what the future will hold for those children or even if our paths will cross again.

Today is the beginning of a new tradition! I am writing you a We Gotcha Letter!

I will never forget the day that we got the news that you were going to be coming to live with us. I was at lunch with my boss at Anderson’s Barbecue and Heather called my cell phone and said “they have a boy for us”. “He has some medical issues and will likely need heart surgery and they need a family to stay with him until after the surgery then the grandmother will take him”. This sounds pretty intimidating but I felt deep down God telling me that this is a child you need in your life. I made the call and you were on your way. You were precious from day one. A little blue at times from the heart defect but precious none the less. I thank God everyday that he spoke to my spirit about you.

There were points and times in your life where we thought you were going to live with family or complete strangers. I grieved terrible at this news. It tore me up inside and I was determined to do everything in my power to fight for you regardless of the hopelessness that seemed to face us. I called every lawyer in the book, followed every lead, each road lead me to “There is nothing you can do legally” sorry Michael. That is when I realized that I was pursuing the wrong path. I had to turn it over to God and I did. Weeks after that we got the news that the situation had resolved itself and you were going to be ours. We were cautiously optimistic.

Today was a glorious day Gabe! What we have been waiting on for 17mths has come to an end and a new beginning.

We had to wake up really early. Obviously you were not excited about this :) We got you in the van and headed on our 2hr drive to Greenville to the court house. You were still in your diaper so you could chow down on your breakfast and not mess up your court clothes :) We got there late of course and got you dressed and rushed into the court house were we met with our attorney. One of us chased you up and down the stairs while the other listened to the lawyer and signed papers. He told us what to expect. He said it was anticlimactic in a way. It was time 9am. We waited for the prisoners from the local jail dressed in their red and white striped jump suites and handcuffs to enter the court then we followed in and sat on the back row of the courtroom. We thought we would be first to go but they took several cases before us. You and a quite courtroom do not get along so I took you out in the hall just outside the courtroom and let you run up and down the hall. Everyone had to comment on how cute you were in your court clothes :) Meanwhile I had been sick so the sweat was pouring down me now due to the fever and the hot court room. My shirt was soaked. Every time the door would open I would hold my breath thinking it was the lawyer coming to get us. This happened 10 or 15 times. Finally the lawyer poked his head out the door and said it is time! I swept you in my arms and marched straight for the judges bench not looking at anyone for fear I would burst into tears at any moment! Finally our family Heather, Hannah, Tara, Kiya, and your half sister Laura were standing in front of this half bald judge. I glanced to the right quickly to see my beautiful family but turned away quickly trying to avoid crying again. FOCUS Michael FOCUS. I fixed my eyes on the lawyers beard. He had said we will need to answer about 10 questions all of which will be answered with “Yes”. How hard can that be? Staring straight at his beard as he begins to ask the questions trying not to even hear them but to listen for the end of the sentence so I can say “YES”. Finally the end of the first question. “Mr. Faries is that correct?” Weak and softly I say “yes”. “Mr. Faries can you please speak up so the court reporter can hear you?” I clear my throat and belt out a powerful “YES”. Whew I made it through the first question! The second and third questions came and went still focusing back and forth between his beard and the court reporters little cup like device she speaks into trying not to think about the hugeness of the moment. Question five, six, seven, and eight went down with a powerful and resounding “YES”. Then it happened, sweat pouring out of every pour in my body, I lost my gaze and looked to my right and saw my beautiful family and our friends who were there to catalog this moment. At that moment a million what if’s collided with the certainty and finality of this very moment. It hit me like a ton of bricks. A thousand emotions flooded me and I broke into tears. Question nine was answered with a clutching of you to my check as my tears ran down your face and a weak head nod. “Will the record show Mr Faries nodded yes?” “Mr. Faries you are obviously excited about this moment”. Man was that an understatement! Question ten was greeted with the continuation of the last shaking of my head “YES”! My questions are over and I think I did pretty well :) Heather answers the last two questions with a quick “Yes” and the lawyer turns to the judge and says “I rest my case”. The finality of this moment ended when the judge slammed his gavel down with a smile on his face and said “I approve this adoption!”

I will never forget this moment in my life and I hope this will give you a little insight into how I felt at that moment when you became my forever son.

I love you with all of my heart, all of my soul, You are my SON!

Love Daddy,

I pledge my children to Heaven

“Oh no matter whatever the cost, I'm gonna count all things lost.
Well I pledge my son, I pledge my wife, I pledge my head to heaven”

This is one of my favorite lyrics.  It was written by a man named Keith Green in a song called “I Pledge my head to heaven”.  Keith knew what it meant to follow Christ.  He knew he had to die to himself he had to put God before all things he held dear.  He had to pledge his children, his wife, and even his own head to heaven to pursue the gospel.

This week another little one is going home and as I was sitting writing my goodbye letter to her these lyrics popped into my head.  I have to sacrifice my desires and my plans for the plans God has.  It is difficult but I have to pledge my children to Heaven.  We did our part to be the vessel when called upon to fill a void in their lives and I am determined to be grateful that I got to be a part at all instead of all the what if’s or concentrating on what I will miss in their lives. 

Each time I sit down to write on of these letters that is the hardest part.  I imagine all the phases of their lives and I can see them growing in my minds eye and it makes me long to want to be there for every moment.  Every tee ball game or every dance recital, every first step, every lost tooth, every first and every last, every sorrow and every joy.

God called me to be above the moment, to be above my desires, He called me to pledge my Children to Heaven, and to count all things as lost for the gospel.

My heart breaks but my purpose is fulfilled….

Roots

Even the biggest tree you can imagine grew from a tiny little seed.  Once planted the seed extends its root system down into the soil and absorbs the nutrients from the soil.  The bigger the tree the larger the root system.  If you go to transplant a tree from one location to another you must dig up the entire root system to go with it for it to survive.

Everyone of us has our own roots.  Our roots are our life experiences with each new experience our root system gets larger and larger. Like the tree our root system is transplanted with us.  I went back to my roots this past week.  I went back to small town North Carolina where I grew up and lived until I was 34.  This part of my root system of course makes up the lions share of my roots. 

 

My roots are old country roads, drinking SunDrop and Cheerwine while enjoying a nice Moonpie on the porch,

 

a pace of life that is slow and deliberate, a country draw that is equally slow and deliberate, tall evergreens and trees everywhere, vibrant eye popping fall colors, long muggy summer nights with the nightly thunderstorm rolling through, cruising the strip in downtown Concord in my brothers old Trans Am,  the old Sears building in downtown where our band used to practice, Chips (of Squids fame of course) music store where we would go to scope out new gear,

The Red Pig where we would go for greasy food, the long grandeur of the houses on Union street in Concord, a clear reminder of a simpler time with the large plantation style housing and huge trees lining each side of the street reeking of history,

of course NASCAR!  NASCAR was born on the back roads of North Carolina where they used to tork up their cars to haul their moonshie and stay one step ahead of the law.  The idol worship of our native son No. 3!

it’s old friends and memories everywhere I look.  We were staying about an hour away from where I grew up but I still managed to see someone I knew at the local Wal-Mart. 

No matter where I live I will always be connected in a very deep way to this part of God’s creation for it is in my roots.

Feel free to leave memories of your roots.

The Premature Agree’er

Me: “Hi I’m…”
PA: “Yeah”
Me: “Michael” holding my hand out
Me: “I am”
PA: “Yeah”
So now I see that he is a premature agree’er I rush through the sentence so that he can not agree to whatever I am saying.
Me: “HereToSetupYourComputer”  There I got it out without a interruption.
PA: “Yeah uh huh” “Great!”

This guy was a foreigner of some origin perhaps Russian which is only relevant because he had that accent that made it even funnier. 

So why do premature agree’ers do this?

1) They are reading my mind and have already foreseen everything that I am about to say and agree with it.  This one is highly unlikely as I think there is little scientific proof that this is a true phenomena plus if he was reading my mind he would understand I was irritated by his constant interruptions.

2) He is highly intelligent and can both speak and listen at the same time.  This is plausible as he is a propeller head.  I will keep this as a possibility.  He didn’t ask questions so either he completely understood everything I said (as he talked over me) or he is going to be entering a lot of trouble tickets soon.

3) He is completely nervous about his language skills and does this out of nervous habit.  I think this is the most likely.  I can not say this is true for every premature agree’er but I think this was for mine.

PA: “Yeah uh huh…. Great!”

Another trip around the track?

It’s what feels like a thousand degree’s outside, the breezes come in short stingy breaths, and you are standing in a line that seems a mile long with 200 strangers.  Working your way through the maze like herded cattle you finally are within eye sight of the prize, the payoff to all the sweat and uncomfortable closeness.  There it is a breeze from the roller coaster as it rushes into the station, full of wind blown people half with a look of terror and half with a look of glee.  You work your way to the final cattle gate (you choose the front to see all the action).  Strap yourself in and hold on for dear life.  A sudden jolt and you are out of the station, a slow gentle meander to the first big hill. Click, Click, Click, Click as the cars climb up the hill, the anticipation growing with each progressive click, the clicking stops as you crest the hill, the bottom seems behind you as you throw your hands in the air and plummet to the bottom of the hill, your stomach leaps out, you loose your breath, and you feel like you are about to fly out of the safety devices that you checked a thousand times before.  There is a brief lull at the bottom then right back up the next hill you feel so alive and so close to death at the same time.

Heather and I got on this roller coaster of fostering  two years ago.  We had the long line of being certified then the anticipation as we climbed the hill wondering when we would get to the crest of our first placement and now we are rushing at ungodly speeds being jarred and jolted exhilarated and frightened at the same time through two years of placements, paperwork, trials, and triumphs.  The training we received really prepared us in no way for what we were getting into.  They teach you about the proper restraint of a child, the how to’s of med logs, CPR, etc but they do not prepare you for the emotional roller coaster you waited in line for. 

After our second placement Rylan left we had no idea what to do we had no support no understanding of how to handle the loss.  It was like someone kidnapped our child and everyone knew it but didn’t care.  “Sir we know your child is missing but that’s ok that is the way it is supposed to be, just deal with it!”.  While we were happy he was with family it still didn’t replace the hole left in our family and in our hearts.  Why don’t they prepare you for this or at least help you through it?  I don’t know to be honest.  Perhaps they think no one would be foster parents if they knew the heart ache before them.

This roller coaster has given us intense joy and intense pain.  As the coaster pulls into the station once again in a couple weeks to let another passenger off we have to decided do we want to strap ourselves back in for another trip around the track.

Save the terrorist, kill the babies!

I think my wife it right… It is going to be a long 4 years (or 8) for me.  So far Obama has signed an executive order to shut down Guantanamo Bay and has reasserted his vow to sign the FOCA if it gets through the new congress.

Why would the terrorist rights be so important to him yet the rights of the unborn child are of no concern.  Obama has said on many occasions that he is Pro Choice and that is not going to change he is going to do everything he can to further this agenda.  This is one of the Changes he talked about on the campaign trail.  The American people (and A LOT of Christians) gave him the tools to do it by electing a Democratic Congress/Senate/Whitehouse!  A few Supreme Court nominations and he has free reign to do anything he wants to do. 

Change and Hope! 

Hey Obama! What color is the sky?

Ah… ah… ah… ah… Government!

No Obama Government is not the answer to everything!

 

I wrote that myself :) I may add that to my stand up routine.

Fine! I’m a raciest then!

I have managed to keep myself pretty distracted since the election with various activities such as football, children, work etc so I have managed to keep my blood pressure under control (Except for when the Panthers choked and lost to the Cardinals in the playoffs! Dangit there goes my blood pressure again!). 

Yesterday got my head spinning again and my blood pressure up.  I was surrounded by the notion that I have to be excited about Obama becoming President.  Let me preface this by saying I understand the importance and I even blogged about it at the time it happened.

Yesterday I was torn.  I am happy we elected an African American but had trouble getting excited about the African American that we elected (of course I did not vote for him as you might have guessed).  I am opposed to practically everything he stands for, big government, homeland security, abortion, foreign policy, just to name a few.  Because I disagree with this African American and I am not excited to see this African American take office and start this country in a direction I am against I am a raciest!  I think this is ridiculous but I have experienced it myself from someone very close to me and I see it in the media where opposition to Obama is considered raciest as opposed to just ideological differences. 

When Obama was elected I told someone that he was elected by two groups: African Americans, and people that hate Bush.  My point was that a lot (not all) African Americans voted for Obama because he was African American and that if that was the only reason they voted for him then it was raciest.  If you have no clue what he stands for or what he plans to do with the country and still voted for him because he is the same race as you then that in my opinion is raciest.  This person did not agree and thought/thinks I am a raciest.  I suppose his race makes him untouchable and his ideas valid just on the color of his skin.  This is going to be a long raciest 4 years for me!

I am not excited about the President the country elected and if racism was indeed dead then I should be able to say that and not be labeled at all (except perhaps a conservative).  I honestly do not care what color he is but I disagree with his policies whole heartedly and if that makes me a raciest then fine!

The children the system makes

Last weekend I spent the day in Behavioral Management class for foster parent training through our agency.  The instructor was Dan one of my favorites, he has been doing this for 30 years and knows the whys behind kids that are in the system.  He has seen it all. 

Last summer he decided it was time to get some “field” experience. He has taught for years and intellectually understands how to deal with abused and neglected children but had never had hands on experience full time.  He and his wife bit the bullet and took in a 9yr old boy named Zack.  They got him straight out of a mental institute where he had been placed after his last placement in the foster care system ended badly.  Zack had been in the system since he was 2yrs old.

Dan learned very quickly he was head deep in what he had been teaching all these years.  Zack was misdiagnosed in the mental institution to have Bi Polar.  He had many diagnosis which I will get to in a minute.  He was diagnosed with Bi Polar because that is one of the illnesses that the institute gets paid for.  If they had accurately diagnosed him and medicated him to treat those diagnosis the institute would not get paid. Which I find outrageous.  The government gone awry again.

The first thing Dan had to do was to get him seen by his therapist and get the right diagnosis and get him on the right medications.  He was diagnosed with RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder), ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder), and ADHD.

Dan and his wife spent months working with Zack by applying his years of strategies and philosophies.  He admitted that even with the intellectual power to understand the why behind the behavior he found himself in timeout quite often.  You see Zack was also diagnosed with encopresis which is uncontrollable soiling.  The doctors said that he could not control this but Dan found that Zach would use this as a passive aggressive tool to get back at them.  He did not do it anywhere but at the house.  Anywhere that it would embarrass him he did not have an accident.  This issue in particular drove Dan to the point of braking.

Dan’s goal was to take a hopeless kid and get him to the point of being adoptable.  Dan and his wife are in their mid fifties so their intention was never to adopt him because they were just too old but to get him to a point where he could attach and be adopted.

They had reached this goal for the most part.  It got to the point where his psychiatric team decided it was time to start moving in that direction.  So they set Zack down and explained that they would not be adopting him or anyone one due to their age so that he would understand they are not rejecting him but would reject anyone in the same way.  They told him he would be adopted by another family an they would be his forever family!  Zack seemed to process this and seemed to repeat back that he is not being rejected again.

While he accepted this on the outside on the inside something snapped and within days he was back to square one.  Dan had failed and he and his wife could not continue because it was so draining.  Zack had to be readmitted into the mental institution.  They all promised to stay in touch and he still calls wanting to come back to Dan and his wife but it is just not possible.

These are the kids the system makes.  I asked Dan what would become of Zack.  He said frankly, since his wife was  not there, Zack will be incarcerated at an early age and will be a life long criminal and drug abuser because he has relied on the meds for so many years.  I followed up with, If Zach had a stable family from the beginning and had never been in the system what would be the outcome.  He said that all of his problems were created by the system and by an over developed lymbic system.  Because the human body develops from the Top down and from the center out this is one of the first systems to develop.  Because of the trauma it over develops this fight or flight system.

The sad truth is Zack is lost to the system.  Because Dan got him so old he did not have an opportunity to change his belief systems.  It was so much a part of who he was it could not be changed.  We need more good people in the system that can care for and make a difference in these children so that no more Zack’s ever fall through the cracks.

Don't look now but you have a fish on your bumper!

I was a little sleepy this morning driving to work. Instead of a "Geographical Oddity, Two weeks from everywhere" (O Brother, Where Art Thou?) I live in a "Time Zone Oddity". Every show comes on at 9pm BHT (Baby House Time). We don't watch anything live so we wait until the kids are in bed to watch any TV shows so last night I started the 2hr premiere of 24 starting at 9. I am old so that is pushing my ability to keep my eyes open.

After dragging myself out of bed and taking a hot shower I drudge out to the car and get on with my commute at about 6am. Not long after being on the road the truck in front of me catches my eye. I have to take a double take and wipe my eyes. Every time the truck puts on brakes I see something moving back and forth and two tiny red lights near the bumper. This woke me up quick and peaked my interest. I got closer and noticed it was a fish on his trailer hitch ball. I almost ran into the back of him several times because I was mesmerized by this stupid thing.

Order your Accident Initiator now!
You can get various others as well. I like the Bad Dog and my favorite Whoa Horsey .

A son is born!

We have been through this several times already.  It always starts the same "Guys looks like this one is going to be available are you interested in adopting?"  "Well of course we are!"  I understand that they need to ask that question even when they have no clue if it is reality or not but I wish they would save that question until there is a little more evidence that it will be reality.

In June of this year things looked great for baby T .  We had just seen baby Jesse off to go be with this bio family and we needed a break!  So I had some work to do in Houston and the family went with me to unwind clear our minds of the heartbreak we just went through.  We lost Jesse but baby T was still there and things were looking good.  We decided to start calling him by the name we are going to call him when he is adopted so he can get used to it.  We let our guard down. 

Not long after returning from that trip my wife calls me and tells me that we should prepare ourselves to loose baby T things have changed and there is practically no chance we will ever get to keep him.  He is going to be taken from us and given to a family of his own heritage.

Emotions spewed out of me I balled my eyes out, cried to God, got mad at the world.  I called every lawyer in the book trying to do everything humanly possible to fight for MY SON!  I was going to fight the world to keep  him.  My wife thought I had lost my mind but I was determined to fight for my son!  I knew no one in the world could love this boy more than we do!  I knew what was best for him was our family.  It looked hopeless.  For some odd reason our Country has given the Indian Nation authority over any court in the nation.  What they decide goes.  They never decide for the non-Indian family.

This last Friday driving in my car crying my eyes out again!  This whole time I have not let myself believe it.  I have protected my heart against the pain to be sure I don't feel this again.  January 10th marks the end of the 90 day probation period for Baby T no long lost family member or friend can come out of the woodwork and claim him now.  HE IS OURS!  You see the miracle happened, the father refused a paternity test but also refused any future interest in the case.  Without proof of the father the Indian Nation had no case so they dropped the case and the parental rights were terminated.  The last 90 days I have kept waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Driving in my car Friday I let myself feel it, I let my self believe it, I let myself enjoy it!

MY SON IS HOME!

Who died and gave you an opinion?

The wonder of God's creation is never more evident than in the laugh of a baby!  They look at you with complete adoration and unconditional love.  They are so helpless so completely dependent on you yet they are so full of achievements.  They have their first tooth, they sit up and roll over for the first time, they learn to crawl and to eventually walk.  Their brains are in over drive constantly learning new skills, new ways to play with that same old toy, ways you would have never imagined.  They light up when you walk in the door after a long days work and are so excited to see you, you are their god, their everything!

Enter the rascally teenager!  Unlike the doe eyed baby this creature is illusive.  After returning to my domicile after a long days work this creature is no where to be found.  I have to go searching through the nooks and  crannies to find them only to get a dismissive look once I have located them.  No more meeting me at the door telling me about their day and how much they missed me.  I purposely cherished and soaked in those moments because I knew this day was coming. 

They have reached the point in life where they must start to think for themselves and wean themselves off of their dependence on us.  I understand this and I do not have a problem with them thinking for themselves and having opinions however I had to sit them down and explain a few things. 

You may express your opinion at any point to either or both of us, however, it is all in the way you present your opinion.  You are going to get a lot farther to getting what you want if you express your opinion in a respectful way.  You must only express your opinion once!  If we need clarification or would like for you to tell us more about why you feel that way then have to fear we will ask you.  We take your opinion and weigh that in with the rest of the family.  It is our job to decided what is best for the whole family.  Understand that if we say no or do something contrary to your opinion it is not that we did not value your opinion or you have bad ideas it is just that it was not what was best for the family as a whole.  

What I understand and they do not is that their opinions are often contrary on purpose to stretch or prove their independence.  Their opinions are steeped in selfishness and very little life experience or wisdom.  Their need for independence is essential to them growing into productive functioning adults so I do not want to stifle their creativeness or their own thoughts but I do want them to understand that it is (for now) measured against the greater good of the family.  I will let them figure out for themselves that is is always going to be like that even in their adult life.  Their bosses are going to take their opinion and weigh it against the big picture as well.  No reason to totally burst their bubble now right?

I have half a cold!

Have you ever had a cold where only one nostril is stuffy and the other is fine?  What do you do with that?  Do I just take half the cold medicine I would normally take?  If so how would the medicine know which side of my nose is clogged?  What if it chooses wrong ? Very perplexing.

At least I have one healthy nostril!  Hopefully it will not succumb to the snotty side!

Name that house?

For many years now I have been intrigued by the way the British name their homes.  It started while reading C.S. Lewis over 15 years ago.  His home was called "The Kilns".  You know we Americans name everything we own practically or assign gender to them at the very least.  I have been trying to think of something creative to name our home.  Madhouse seems appropriate, Poopie House also very accurate, Hormone Manor also a fine description, but I want to name it something elegant and regale. 

Most of the houses in England are named after a distinguishing feature of their house like "Red Oak House", Two Chimney Place or after animals "Fox Manor" but they can be named anything and for any reason.  If you have never thought about naming your house give it a thought and let me know what you come up with.  If me and the family come up with a good name I will post it.

Happy New Year!